So, fandom, it’s lookin’ as if it’s gonna be Pillowfort, huh? I’ve already seen people heading over there. It kinda seems to be as if livejournal and tumblr had a baby? And the baby let us all enjoy smut in peace?
I checked out the other options, and Pillowfort seems the most promising. For the record, I haaaaate this, because I really love this stupid website, but I go where fandom goes. However, I’ll be sticking around here until the last possible moment because I hate change, etc.
From someone who’s survived MySpace, livejournal, deviantart, and fanfiction.nets’ content purges and bad policy updates, here’s some advice on how to get through tumblr’s recent bullshit:
– don’t knee jerk delete. I know it’s tempting to peace out immediately but hang on and do the other steps first. Out right ghosting and erasing everything is how fandoms die.
– archive everything on your blog you want to keep
– tell your followers how they can archive and keep your work too. A lot of fic and art were only saved from ff.net and lj because other people saved it first. If you’re cool with other people saving your work for them to personally keep, let them know this. You can absolutely discourage reposting but I really do highly recommend you allow people to personally save fic and art they like and are worried will disappear forever. Digital Dark Ages are a real thing.
– tell people where you’re jumping ship to. Give links. Keep that info up, even if you’ve left the site.
– go through who you follow and find out where else you can follow them. Save their work if they’ll allow it. It’s tedious as hell but if you want to keep up with people on here clicking on their page to check in is the best way to do it.
– support places like ao3. This is exactly why ao3 asks for donations a few times a year. They are a 100% anti-purging, judgement free, ad free non profit run by an elected board and protected by lawyers. Places like ao3 literally save fandom so please continue to support them and other similar archives. This is exactly why ao3 is so important.
*releases pack of dads into home depot* go……be free
invasive species encroach on lesbian territory
This is a common misconception because they’re such similar environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe’s. At this point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at home in both Home Depot and Lowe’s to the point that trying to separate them back into their original ranges would probably do more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores.
A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfortable cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really “encroaching on another’s territory”. You wouldn’t say that about foxes in a forest that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It’s just two different species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals, Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation.
Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a Lowes or Home Depot, that’s where chaos will reign. Being adapted to a far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It would be like releasing bears at a country club.
As a former timber-harvester… I feel this is potentially accurate in theory. But highly improbable in actuality.
Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require more space than the average hardware store, even a big box store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a social species because of how they often work and live together.
This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival technique for thriving under the LogBoss.
A “pack” of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental pressure of a LogBoss will naturally disperse until they each have a wide territory.
Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory.
One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian, however the latter tend to travel in social packs.
Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch.
Getting a “pack” of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok. If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred.
Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware ecosystem. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive.
Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably peaceful unless threatened.
This ma be my most favouritest sentence I’ve read all day:
Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware ecosystem.
Ugh. I have THINGS TO DO, but all I want to do right now is write a thousand words about Spencer and Caleb and how they woke up together and how “last night was perfect” and he won’t ever come between her and caffeine and how he called her out immediately about the deleted text and about the way he looked at her when they were having that not-awkward morning-after convo and about how they’re back to sleuthing together and how Caleb confirmed that he started having feelings for her YEARS AGO but didn’t act on it, so they’ve both just been quietly pining for each other ever since while not-so-platonically orbiting each other and how it just isn’t a coincidence that Caleb moved to where Spencer was and… aw, damn.
Man, it has been over a year since this scene happened and over 10 months since I even posted something about Spaleb, but I am still all UP in my feels.
we can all agree that steve’s a pure blood. there ain’t one ounce of muggle blood in his line. he is, however, the first hufflepuff in years. his mother and father were both slytherins, his grandmother a griffyndor, and his grandfather a ravenclaw. according to his father hufflepuffs are rather useless. so imagine his father’s fucking disappointment when steve comes home with hufflepuff colors on.
billy’s mom was a witch, and one of the best in her class before she died. his father, however, is a muggle and fully planned on hiding billy’s magical side from him. he would have succeeded, too, if he hadn’t been at work when the owl arrived. if billy hadn’t hid the letter and started saving up the money he made mowing neighborhood lawns and cleaning pools. see, billy’s mom raised him on stories of magic and make believe whenever his dad wasn’t around. and billy. well, he never forgot those stories.
he reads about the history of hogwarts on the train ride there and decides, very strongly, that he’d be the perfect gryffindor and, of course, the sorting hat agrees.
he watches some boy with too much hair get sorted into hufflepuff and doesn’t blame the kid for looking totally dejected. hufflepuff seems kind of boring to billy, too.
he meets that boy for the first time on the quidditch field. his name is steve and he’s a new recruit keeper for the hufflepuff team. billy’s one of gryffindor’s new beaters and he grins real wide when he meets them and says, “we’re going to win. just so you know.” and billy’s totally aware that their teams are supposed to be cordial or whatever but that’s not how billy plays muggle sports, and the only thing different with quidditch is that he can fly, so. he’s not there to be friendly, he’s there to win. except. they don’t win, hufflepuff does. and they win because harrington is fucking quick. like god damn lightning. it’s impressive. and aggravating. he doesn’t miss the smug look harrington throws him at the end of the match, either.
+ turns out the competitive spirit born between them that day doesn’t die. not for one god damn second. they only get worse as the years pass. they compete in class, on the field. any-fucking-where they can manage. and by year six they’re both the captains of their respective teams and slytherin is no longer gryffindor’s rival. hufflepuff is.
++ that rivalry comes to a head when the tri-wizard tournament comes around the corner. each school gets one competitor. it’s the ultimate challenge before the actual challenge. billy puts his name in. steve puts his name in. billy’s name pops back out in a plum of fire and smoke and gryffindor cheers like they’ve won the house cup. across the room, the hufflepuffs look dejected, but harrington looks worse. billy just smirks and tosses him a wink.
+++ billy’s surprised when steve walks into his tent right before the first challenge. it’s dangerous– all the challenges are– but billy feels too much adrenaline to really be worried about it. he won’t be scared until he’s on death’s doorstep, that’s just the kind of guy he is. but harrington? christ, harrington looks like he hasn’t slept a wink. he steps up, right into billy’s space, and billy stiffens like he expects the brunette to punch him. instead he says, “you know someone died the last time the tournament was held” and billy’s face scrunches up before he goes, “yeah, ‘cause voldemort killed him–” and when harrington doesn’t respond he goes to add “–but he’s dead so it’s fine.” except he doesn’t get the words out, because suddenly harrington’s lips are on his, desperate and a little forceful, and billy’s kissing back before he even really comprehends the situation.
he barely has time to enjoy it before harrington’s pulling back and the horn is sounding, signaling the start of the first challenge. he looks real serious when he goes, “just don’t fucking die, hargrove” before he’s out of the tent, leaving billy to reel over what just happened alone.
++++ billy wins the tournament. every house cheers. he accepts the cup with a wide, dazzling grin, and shining eyes. eyes that search for harrington in the crowd and don’t leave him for one fucking second once they find him.
+++++ “figures you had to make the first move like that. you’re so competitive–” billy muses a few hours later. he’s laid out on the ground in the middle of the quidditch field with harrington’s warm body beside him and a half-drunk, pilfered ale between them. harrington laughs, loud and warm and goes, “i’m competitive? you fucking–” but this time it’s billy’s turn to shut him up.
Starvinbohemian 